Things I didn't know about motherhood:
You will smell like sour milk even when you don't think you do.
You will be surprised how much another person's body fluids don't bother you anymore.
You will realize you really liked not having your period and plot to get pregnant as soon as possible to keep it at bay.
You will not be able to return emails or phone calls in a timely manner.
You will miss your baby when someone else is holding him.
You will burst with love you didn't know you had.
You will be annoyed that everyone was right when they told you that before you had kids.
You will turn off news programs and movies about child abuse because you can't stand to even hear about it.
You will need your partner more than you ever thought you did.
You will appreciate your parents.
You will turn into this thing if you only use one arm to carry your baby:
Or more accurately, you will turn into this:
This is the one that really concerns me.
